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From casual acquaintances to personal cheerleaders, here are 11 important qualities of a good friend. 1. They live with integrity. A friend with integrity acts in alignment with their values and commitments. They have strong moral principles and will speak or act when someone violates these principles.
- A. Morningstar
- They’re Kind. You’d think this was a given for any type of human interaction, but kindness is often overlooked. We’ve likely experienced that “bend over backwards” kind of kindness that, to be honest, makes people a little uncomfortable.
- They’re Honest. Another of the main qualities of a good friend is that they will let you know when they’re hurt by you, confused by you, see you being foolish, and can tell when you’re hiding.
- They’re Individual. A sense of identity creates amazing bonds. Good friends aren’t trying to become you, they’re fully-realized unto themselves. Their sense of individuality plays off your own, and even enhances areas in both of you that may have gone unnoticed before.
- They’re Adventurous. Boredom is the absence of stimulation, be it mental, emotional, or physical stimulation. Good friends satisfy all three of those areas; they’re adventurous in that they like to do things, think things, feel things, and share in those things with you.
- They’re Trustworthy. Every relationship needs trust as a core quality, and friendships are no exception. “They’re trustworthy and genuine,” Jamie Gruman, Ph.D., professor of organizational behavior and author of Boost: The Science of Recharging Yourself in an Age of Unrelenting Demands, tells Bustle.
- They’re Supportive. Supportive friends are a lifeline. “Good friends offer us various kinds of support, such as emotional support when we’re feeling insecure and information support when we need to know how to handle problems or deal with ambiguities,” Dr. Gruman says.
- They Accept You As You Are. You’re probably comfortable around your good friends because you can be yourself around them; with others, you may put up more of a front or feel less comfortable.
- They Actively Listen. While any friend may listen to what you have to say, a great friend actively listens and engages with you. “A good friend ... asks questions and truly listens to the answers,” Susan MacTavish Best, friendship expert and founder of lifestyle site Living MacTavish, tells Bustle.
- A good friend holds space for you. “Holding space for someone” is a term traditionally used in a therapeutic environment; these days, the phrase has become a buzzword (buzz-phrase?).
- They honor your boundaries. Boundaries are guidelines you create and enforce that teaches people how to treat you. These guidelines establish what you feel safe with and what’s unsafe for you.
- They are kind. Kindness is often so underrated and overlooked. If your friend engages in “bend over backward” kindness, you’ll likely feel uncomfortable and wonder what they want from you.
- A good friend is authentically who they are. Can you imagine having a “good” friend who is everything you want a friend to be, only to discover weeks or months later that they were pretending?
- You like being around them. First things first: You will like being around a truly good friend. That may seem obvious, but you'd be surprised how many people don't actually realize they feel bad around certain people.
- They boost you up. Good friends support you and lift you up when you're down, with Page noting they can be our biggest champions. And as Leeds says, "A good friend is also someone who is committed to their own growth and encourages growth in you," adding that they won't feel jealous or competitive with you, and they'll inspire you to be the fullest version of yourself.
- They're there for you. When the going gets tough, good friends get going. Just like our romantic relationships require effort, maintenance, and care, so, too, do our friendships.
- They share in your happiness and pain. The best friends in our lives are the ones who can celebrate our wins with us but also share in our pain. Page says you know you've got a good friend when you accomplish something and can tell your friend is truly happy for you.
Mar 23, 2015 · These qualities, represented by the traits listed as numbers 6 to 10 above, include empathy, the ability to withhold judgment, effective listening skills, and the ability to offer support in...
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Jun 28, 2023 · A good friend is someone who listens without judgement and offers advice when asked, but also knows when to step back and give you space. We’ve compiled an enormous list of qualities that make for a good friend, and help remind us of how we also can be a great friend to those special people in our lives: 1.
