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Compassion is simply a kind, friendly presence in the face of what’s difficult. Its power is connecting us with what’s difficult—it offers us an approach that differs from the turning away that we usually do. We begin with empathy—that feeling of connection.
Jan 9, 2024 · How to Develop Compassion. Learn the science behind compassion and how to increase it. Updated January 9, 2024 | Reviewed by Gary Drevitch. Source: Photo by Giulia Bertelli on Unsplash....
- Start by practicing self-compassion. Most of us have harsh inner critics who judge us, put us down, and punish us when we make mistakes. As long as you have an inner general beating you up for your inevitable imperfections, you’ll find it difficult to be compassionate with others when they reveal their humanness.
- Put yourself in someone else’s shoes. Life is hard, but we’re all doing the best we can. As the saying goes, "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
- Move beyond your self-referencing. From the time we are children, many of us are taught the, “It’s all about me” mentality. But in reality, we are all one.
- Practice kindness, without people-pleasing. His Holiness, the Dalai Lama, says, “My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.” But many people mistake people-pleasing and approval-seeking with kindness.
- Finding your inner teacher. Expressions of compassion don’t come easily to everyone. If that describes you, it doesn’t mean you lack compassion. According to Michael Kinsey, a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist in New York City, behaviors you’ve learned throughout your life can get in the way of expressing compassion.
- Remembering self-compassion. Self-compassion is real, though you may find it easier to show kindness toward others than to yourself. Albert Nguyen, a licensed psychotherapist from Palo Alto, California, recommends practicing self-compassion in small ways, like allowing yourself to rest when you’re tired.
- Being wary of envy. Envy can be the gatekeeper of compassion, warns Wakefield. If you want to be more compassionate, try to keep envy at bay. Envy is that feeling of resentfulness and longing for the blessings you see in someone else’s life.
- Developing active listening skills. Compassion doesn’t have to take the form of big, sweeping gestures. Nguyen suggests showing compassion through the act of listening.
- Develop a morning ritual. Greet each morning with a ritual. Try this one, suggested by the Dalai Lama: “Today I am fortunate to have woken up, I am alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it.
- Practice empathy. The first step in cultivating compassion, is to develop empathy for your fellow human beings and yourself. Many of us believe that we have empathy, and on some level nearly all of us do.
- Practice commonalities. Instead of recognizing the differences between yourself and others, try to recognize what you have in common. At the root of it all, we are all human beings.
- Practice relief of suffering. Once you can empathize with another person, and understand his humanity and suffering, the next step is to want that person to be free from suffering.
May 14, 2019 · Compassion training can be adopted at any age and involves training the mind to develop specific skills in order to relate to others and to ourselves, and making a conscious effort to think and act in a compassionate manner.
Jul 20, 2023 · If you ever judge or criticize yourself for no justifiable reason, we show you how to practice self-compassion and be kinder to yourself.
