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3 days ago · A twin flame is an intense soul connection with someone thought to be a person's other half, sometimes called a "mirror soul." It's based on the idea that sometimes one soul gets split into two bodies. One of the main characteristics of a twin flame relationship is that it will be both challenging and healing.
- Overview
- Do Twin Flames Exist?
- Signs You’ve Met Your Twin Flame
- Where Did the Concept of Twin Flames Come From?
- The Stages of a Twin-Flame Relationship
- Are Twin Flames Different Than Soulmates?
- Can Twin Flames Break Up?
- Can My Twin Flame and I Get Back Together?
- Are Twin-Flame Relationships Toxic?
- What If My Partner Isn't My Twin Flame?
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Your twin flame is purported to be everything you’re not and everything you need—they're truly your other half. This explains why twin-flame relationships are regarded as one of the most passionate relationships people can experience.
Since you’re likely wondering if you’ve already met or will meet your twin flame (not to be confused with your soulmate), you’re in the right place.
Keep in mind, though, that whether your potential lover is your twin flame or not, twin flame bonds only represent one idea of a happy relationship—you're free to choose what a successful relationship looks like for you.
Verywell Mind spoke to a relationship therapist and a certified hypnotherapist/NLP Practitioner to get more insight into twin-flame relationships.
Read ahead to learn about a possible phenomenon behind twin-flame bonds, the eight signs of a twin-flame relationship, where the concept originated, the stages of this type of relationship, and what to do if you think your partner isn't your twin flame.
It's important to get this question out of the way—do twin flames really exist? It depends on who you ask.
Lastenia Francis, PhD, LMFT, a marriage and family therapist, and founder of Meaningful Emotion Therapy, who notes the possible existence of twin flames. Dr. Francis says, "It's very common for people to have an instant connection. In fact, it can often build and blossom into more than that connection and lead to a self-discovery process."
Now that you know a twin-flame relationship is possible, you probably have someone in mind. Maybe this person is someone you’ve known for most of your life. Or perhaps you came across a random person on social media and just had a hunch that there’s something special about them.
Regardless of the meet-cute, you just know that you're really into them.
Though it can be tough to know for sure if the person in question is your twin flame, here are some signs that could indicate a twin-flame relationship:
•You feel connected to them: Twin flames are tethered by mind, body, and soul. It’s the ‘spark,’ or the magnetic pull you feel toward the other person. You may even feel like you need or crave this person.
•You feel like you know them: Considering your twin flame is your missing piece, you’ll likely feel a deep sense of familiarity and safety in their presence.
•You share an intense romantic passion: Romantic love and lust are intoxicating, and you will likely feel elation and ecstasy in a twin-flame union.
Twin Flames in Greek Mythology
The ancient Greek philosopher Plato sought to determine the meaning of love and did so in his seminal work—"Symposium." The "Symposium" is a dialogue consisting of varying speeches that explore the meaning of love. Each speech is an ode to the Greek god of love—Eros. One of the speeches in the dialogue, given by Greek comedic playwright Aristophanes, introduces the concept of twin flames.
Aristophanes' Speech
In his speech, Aristophanes says that humans used to be round and had four arms, four legs, two pairs of genitals, and two faces on one head. He said that one day, however, the gods believed these humans had far too much power and cut them in half, creating the human form we know today. Thus, humans spent the remainder of their lives desperately searching for their other half—their twin. Why Can't I Stop Thinking About Someone?
If we use the concept of limerence to explain twin flame bonds, the Limerence Theory suggests that there are distinct stages of a limerent union:
1.Initial meeting: A relationship begins when you meet someone you are attracted to.
2.Feelings of uncertainty creep in: After this person catches your eye, you wonder if they might reciprocate your feelings.
3.Obsession: This uncertainty may lead you to ruminate about this person.
4.Passionate feelings increase: Whether the person reciprocates your feelings or not, passion will be high at this stage.
5.A decline in feelings: Limerence Theory suggests that once a person’s love is reciprocated or denied, the uncertainty (which fueled the romantic feelings) dissipates. Thus, the feelings begin to lessen in intensity or decline altogether.
Yes! Since limerence can be a possible explanation for twin-flame relationships, we can use Tennov's observations and compare them to various soulmate definitions.
Kailani Raye, certified hypnotherapist and NLP practitioner who's worked as a life and mindset coach for two years and founded The Four-Letter Project says, "When I think about soulmates—they're the person we're supposed to do life with. In the spiritual realm, I feel like people are tied to us. We have multiple soulmates. However, we don't always end up with twin flames."
Raye says that twin-flame relationships are often meant to teach us something about ourselves. "They [our twin flames] are mirrors being held up to us. That mirror will allow you to grow, develop yourself, and pull out traumas and triggers."
According to Raye, our twin flames relationships will lead us closer to our soulmates.
Sadly, yes. Not all twin-flame relationships will stand the test of time. Dr. Francis says that "twin flames, like anything [any other relationship], have the potential to not be the greatest [union] because it paints an unrealistic expectation of such an instant connection."
Additionally, based on Tennov’s observations, twin-flame relationships are likely to result in a breakup. Tennov found that limerent relationships last an average of two years. Lifetime limerent bonds, according to Tennov’s observations, are rare.
Kailani Raye, Certified hypnotherapist, NLP practitioner
Anything that is for you will never pass you by. — Kailani Raye, Certified hypnotherapist, NLP practitioner Raye says, "People, in general, have the ability to change. Sometimes, you need to experience people, and, at the moment, they serve as a twin flame where you'll experience all of your triggers and lead to many breakthroughs." She notes that following this period, you and your twin flame may need space from one another because patterns are hard to break when you're still in the relationship. Raye also believes that "Anything that is for you will never pass you by." Raye notes that she has also witnessed reconciliation before. She says that some people found their way back to each other after having space and time to grow. After the healing period, she believes that "twin flames have the ability to step into a 'soulmate-ship.'"
Obsessing About Love
If you find that you're thinking about your twin flame a lot, it could become an issue. For instance, it is possible, to become addicted to love. Love addiction (also known as pathological love) describes an obsessive form of love. A person with love addiction might become so interested in another person that they neglect other aspects of their life.
When a Belief In Twin Flames Becomes Unhealthy
Raye cautions people not to place too much of their relationships on the concept of twin flames. She states, "If we're relying so heavily on this one thing [the concept of twin flames]" this belief can become unhealthy as we'll begin to "disconnect from our own intuitive power." Raye suggests we still need to "be in control of our judgment, our thoughts, [and] actions."
When to Seek Help
If you find that thoughts of your love interest are taking over your life, it's recommended that you reach out to a mental health professional. Also, if you're experiencing any form of abuse in your relationship or feel unsafe, seek help immediately. If you or a loved one are a victim of domestic violence, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 for confidential assistance from trained advocates. For more mental health resources, see our National Helpline Database. What to Know If You're Concerned About a Toxic Relationship
It’s totally OK if you don’t know or are unsure your partner is your twin flame. Because most evidence suggesting the existence of twin flames has been gathered from personal anecdotes, it is difficult to know that twin-flame relationships are 100% real.
Dr. Francis says that it's important to consider the commitment level in any relationship. "Most relationships can work if you are committed to the work."
It's worth mentioning that how you view your partner can also impact your relationship quality.
For example, one study noted that people who believed their partner was their ideal mate reported greater relationship satisfaction than those who did not believe they were in a relationship with their soulmate.
Apr 28, 2022 · A " twin flame " isn't necessarily a romantic soul mate or what someone might call “the one” — but they will always change your life, often from the very first time you cross paths. Have...
Learn the basics of twin flames, the rare and intense soul connections that push you to grow and evolve. Discover the signs, stages and challenges of the twin flame journey and how to reach union with your other half.
Aug 6, 2024 · What is a twin flame? “Twin flames” is a modern concept. New age spiritualist Elizabeth Clare Prophet coined the term in 1999 as part of a larger cosmology. Here are the basics: In the beginning, you were a soul. A higher power split that soul in two.
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Sep 29, 2023 · A “twin flame” is a New Age concept that describes a certain intense connection between two individuals who are supposedly “two halves of one whole.” “Twin flame” is...
Learn what a twin flame is, how to spot yours, and the different types of twin flame relationships. A twin flame is a soul that’s forever linked to yours, part of a higher dimensional entity, and the goal is to achieve union through spiritual growth.
